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Jan 5, 2010

A joke from Timequake by Kurt Vonnegut, Jr.

I was burning through Timequake today and picked up this gem. I also found out that Geekologie just posted this in December, but I don't care. It's an awesomely lame joke.
"There was a fugitive who sought shelter in the home of a woman he knew. Her living room had a cathedral ceiling, which is to say it went all the way up to the roof peak, with rustic rafters spanning the air space below.
She was a widow, and he stripped himself naked while she went to fetch some of her husband's clothes. But before he could put them on, the police were hammering on the front door with their billy clubs. So the fugitive hid on the top of a rafter. When the woman let in the police, though, his oversize testicles hung down in full view.
The police asked the woman where the guy was. The woman said she didn't know what guy they were talking about. One of the cops saw the testicles hanging down from a rafter and asked what they were. She said they were Chinese temple bells. He believed her. He said he'd always wanted to hear Chinese temple bells.
He gave them a whack with his billy club, but there was no sound. So he hit them again, a lot harder, a whole lot harder. Do you know what the guy on the rafter shrieked?
He shrieked, TING-A-LING, YOU SON OF A BITCH!"

2 comments:

  1. This would be a good skit :D.

    Nice one.

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  2. read the book. the context in which this joke was put is even better than the joke. this is just the joke that was presented in that particular situation.

    timequake, im telling you. pure gold.

    ReplyDelete