So, God just sent me an E-Mail...

Dear Tony,

   As you well know, it has always been my unfortunate duty to issue bad news to all of my creations. And Tony, I have always liked you. I've reached out and personally intervened in your times of hardship before and given you hope and the tools needed to lift yourself out of despondency. It has been my joy in the past to do these things. But now, even though you and your family show promise and good will, it has become your time to be shit on.